In 2019, news hit the headlines that actress Venita Akpofure had ended things with her now ex-husband and father to her two children, Terna Tarka.
Before the news of the break hit the internet, Venita and Terna were two of the hottest couples on the block. They posted romantic pictures together, had two beautiful babies together, and everything looked picture perfect. Until it wasn’t.
Many people say that while marriage is a constant school where everyday each partner learns from the other and grows, divorce is a more brutal school, a school where hard truths come to light and searing lessons are learnt.
After her failed marriage to Terna, Venita has learnt a lot. These are 3 of the lessons Venita leant after her marriage ended.
1. Divorce is a tough decision only made easier with good support.
Speaking about one of the major lessons she learnt about divorce, Venita Akpofure revealed to Punch that:
One of the toughest decisions I have made was leaving my marriage. It became known to the public about seven months after I had moved out of my matrimonial home. I am grateful that I had a great support system that really helped me through that period.
2. Single motherhood is no joke.
Being a mother to two children from her marriage, upon divorce, Venita found herself in the single mothers club and says about it:
Being a single mother is not easy, especially if one works a lot. I had to multi-task to make sure I’m there for my kids. I don’t consider being in the limelight as a fulfilment. Fulfilment, for me, comes from within, which is when I am meeting personal goals and providing for my kids.
3. She now knows what she DOES NOT want in her next man
When Venita was asked in an interview with Premium Times what a relationship deal-breaker for her now is, she said:
If a man has no drive and I mean no drive, no battery. So if he’s no longer willing to try, that’s a deal-breaker for me. I think the worst character trait a man can exhibit in a relationship is not to have any drive.
You need to be able to captain your ship as a man; your wife needs to be able to trust and believe in your vision, decision-making, and problem-solving. The minute a woman that you love stops believing in any of that, it’s a miss.
So to recap: leaving a marriage is not an easy decision, being a single mother is very hard, and a man with no drive and no willingness to try is a man she will never accept… I think these are very solid lessons.
While it is of course sad that her marriage had to end, it is good to see that Venita has not only learnt some lessons but is also passing that knowledge unto her fans and the world in general.
From your own experience dating, what are YOUR personal deal breakers? Let me know by leaving a comment on my Facebook post.